Blooming into 28!

Holy crap, I just celebrated my 28th birthday yesterday, surrounded by my dearest friends. The years fly by too quickly! I feel like one of those Russian nesting dolls: I'm 28 but I'm also the 23-year-old Lena and the 17-year-old Lena and the 10-year-old Lena, all stacked into one 28-year-old giant Babushka doll. Five years ago, I graduated from uni with so much uncertainty, anxiety and fear in my heart. It was the first time where I had to take full responsibility for the choices in my life and I felt swallowed by my indecision in all areas of my life.  For a long time, I blamed my upbringing, my circumstances, my relationships but in the end, I'm accountable for myself.  Fast forward 5 years (after lots of winding roads and hard knocks by the school of life), I'm fully content and peaceful in this moment. The same problems are still here but they feel lighter. Despite the occasional bump on the road, I think that each year gets better and better. So I want to embrace 28 with a warm hug and wish for a year of growth and intentionality :)

PS: My blog is still alive and kicking. I've got SO MANY pictures to share with you. But first, lemme get through wedding season :P

Hot Cocoa for the Soul

Adrienne and I spent our Sunday morning booking accommodation for our trip to Mexico this upcoming Spring. Our accommodation ended up costing us less than $100 per person for a full week and we're just so stoked to stuff our faces with delicious street food and explore the colorful streets of San Miguel de Allende. To celebrate a productive morning, we walked to Cacao 70 factory for some delicious hot chocolate! We had the black sesame hot chocolate and it was really interesting. The taste reminded me of those black sesame soups you can get in Chinatown but with the texture of thin hot chocolate. I'm usually a big fan of black sesame but chocolate always trumps my heart so I preferred my traditional dark hot chocolate. I love the Cacao70 factory because it's such a cool space and they have the cutest products on display. Adrienne and I couldn't stop gushing over the adorable packaging!  

Honesty

For a while now, I've been waking up in the middle of the night with heart palpitations and a deep sense of loneliness. To distract myself from these negative feelings, I've been working a lot of overtime hours. So much so that I burned myself out and got sick. I'm recovering right now and decided to catch up with Adri over some coffee and croissant. I'm not sure how our conversation veered in this direction but she told me: "You know you can rely on us". I took a sip from my tea and replied: "I just don't want to burden you guys with my pain". I didn't want to cause unnecessary worries. That is, until Adri said something that completely changed my perspective. She said that if I didn't want to share my struggles with my closest friends, then they also felt like they could not share their struggles with me in fear of "burdening me". I had never thought about it in that way but it made a lot of sense.  By trying to keep things inside of myself, I inadvertently created a distance between me and those who cared about me. It's as if I was holding up a sign saying: "no thanks for your support! I can do this on my own." Now that I've realized this, I have to actively remind myself that it's okay to ask for help, to break down and to depend on others when the going gets tough.  That's what friends are for. Yeah, this post has nothing to do with the content of the photos but the realization happened at Automne Boulangerie.  

The Show Must Go On

It's been 4 months since I last blogged and boy have things flipped upside down in this short period of time. For those of you who enjoyed catching a glimpse of Frog here and there, sadly to announce but he's hopped off the panda network. I left our apartment with a broken heart, moved back in with my parents and I'm trying to move on, one day at a time.  Therefore, the regular programming will just feature panda, food and her friends.

Since today is a cold and rainy November day, I wanted to bring some greenery to this blog's landscape. This summer I visited the botanical gardens with Adri and we got to witness the inspiring Stickwork by Patrick Dougherty.  "Have elves sprung up during the night to weave their shelters?" I wonder. When you walk through the twig sculptures, it feels as if you are stepping right into a folk tale. Patrick has made over hundreds of these sculptures all around the world in the past 25 years and we were lucky to catch this display because it only lasted for a short time. Maybe the transient nature of this artwork is what makes it so beautiful. 

Feeling the LOV

Earlier last week, Eli and I checked out LOV's new downtown location and tried some vegan burgers. They were pretty filling but I gotta say: I still prefer my juicy regular burger. It felt nice to hangout and unwind after work. It's funny to think that a year ago, I didn't really know Eli. She was a friend of a friend whom I met at a Tori Kelly concert and we got along but I'm always wary about referring friends or working in close proximity with friends. The reason is because any work environment can generate tension easily: with tight deadlines, high stress and team work, you're bound to get frustrated from time to time. Fortunately, Eli and I have the same values and work ethic (I think she's even harder working than I am) so naturally we became buddies even outside work. I'm pretty happy that it worked out this way because as we get older, it's harder to start new friendships. We often have so many things to juggle on our plates that making time to nurture a new relationship can be daunting. This is a reminder for me to prioritize friendships and make time for the people that count.    

Belated 26th Birthday

It's been a while since I've thrown a few random photos together and called it a blog post. Today seems like a fine day to do so since I'm celebrating my birthday belatedly on the blog and in real life. My birthday was last Wednesday but I didn't have time to celebrate because I had a wedding gig the weekend before and the weekend after my birthday. I wanted to take a break from all the editing so Frog and I hopped over to Agrikol to enjoy their patio. They have a special BBQ menu for the patio which is a little bit pricier than their indoor menu but the experience is well worth it. I just love the relaxed backyard vibe with the bright yellow picnic tables and pretty white patio sets. I jokingly told Frog that my dream wedding would be a backyard wedding with sparkling lights dangling from trees and a very warm and homey feeling. We ought to reserve Agrikol right now for our reception. He wasn't too keen on the idea :-/ Anyhow, I'm actually happy to be turning a year older. It means that more experiences, life lessons and beautiful memories awaits and that I'm getting closer to the person I aspire to be. I'm finally starting to achieve a balance between work, personal life and my creative aspirations. I know things will only get better so I'm excited to see what 26 has in store for me! Let's give 26 a BIG WELCOME HUG!